ay 1:
I'm in heaven! I found a place where lettuces grow for as far as the eye can see! I have decided to start this journal so that future caterpillars will know that such places exist and that you may some day find one if you are of pure enough spirit!

Day 3:
Lettuce is the food of the gods. Everyday I awake and find myself surrounded by the glorious green of scrumptious food! I stuff myself all day long and by evening I seem to have had no effect on the amount of lettuce here! I'm the luckiest caterpillar alive!

Day 6:
I had a crazy idea today. I'm going to live in a lettuce. I figure that I can eat my way in and gnaw out a couple of rooms and furniture. Imagine having so much food that you would consider making a comfy sofa out of it rather than eat it!

Day 9:
Lettuce is probably the best food ever. My new home is complete. I will sleep soundly knowing that I'm surrounded by a bountiful supply of food.

Day 11:
I'm considering extending my house some more. With so much food I'll be a hit with the women and I really should start planning for the future.

Day 14:
Construction of my lettuce palace began today, the main hall is looking fabulous! Tomorrow I start work on the master bedroom.

Day 18:
Construction continues, the kitchen and game room are now complete.

Day 20:
I think I'm going to hold off on further extensions. Lettuce really is nice but maybe I'll try to find something different to eat tomorrow.

Day 21:
EARTHQUAKE!! I was awoken from a very pleasant dream about carrots by a wild shaking, this continued for some time. Eventually it stopped but I don't think I dare investigate until tomorrow. I'll just have a quick nibble on the coffee table and try and get back to sleep.

Day 22:
I tried to leave my lettuce mansion today but when I got to the front door I found my way blocked by a strange inedible transparent barrier. The earthquake must have been intense as all the lettuces seem to have been uprooted and piled on top of each other. I'll try and eat my way out another way.

Day 24:
Attempts to escape from my fabulous lettuce mansion are beginning to be hindered by my ability to eat lettuce. Not that I'm complaining, but it would be nice to eat something else for a change.

Day 25:
It seems uncommonly cold for this time of year. Once I figure out how to get everything back to normal I think I'm going to redecorate my lettuce house. I am starting to tire of the colour green.

Day 26:
I'm starting to think that the earthquake was the end of the world, there is no way it should be this cold at this time of year. Every now and again there are aftershocks from the quake but I can never see anything from the front door, just other lettuces.

Day 29:
There is nothing to do except eat lettuce. It is getting too cold to venture far from the center of my home.

Day 35:
I fucking hate lettuce. These green walls mock me with lettuce-like malice!

Day 37:
I don't think I'm going to last much longer. I hope someone reads this and learns the truth about lettuces. They are evil, sent here to trap honest caterpillars. Don't trust them.

Day ? - 8am:
I don't know what day it is anymore, this cold means I sleep a lot so I can't keep track. It's difficult to think straight, but something is different.

11am:
I'm free! I don't know how but I appear to be in some huge cavern. I can't see the sun, but it's warmer and the transparent barrier is gone!

6pm:
I saw a creature larger than you can imagine. It picked up the lettuce I was sat on (I still dare not explore too far, this place is so strange,) and lifted me high into the air. (I think towards it's face.) It tried to communicate with me but it's voice was so low, it was nothing but a vibration to me. None the less, I must owe my life to this creature. I will consider how I can express my gratitude.

6:15pm:
That bastard ate my house!